Miracles are the light at the end of the tunnel...

I didn't come to know God because of any miracles.  In fact quite the opposite actually.  When I was on my knees that 1st time, I wasn't praising Him by far.  I was angry, hurt, and at my the bottom of my pit (possibly the ledge, because I still see where it could have gotten worse).  People kept saying to me what a Good God  He was and all I could see was a bunch of pain.  GOOD?  'If this is good, I'd hate to see bad,'  I thought to myself.  I stayed in that thinking rut for a little while longer. 

God was creeping in every nook and cranny He could find.. He's good like that!  ;)  He was shaking me up, and exposing me to myself.  I was alone.  I had tried filling this hole in my could that could only be filled by Him.  My God shaped hole did not accept anything in it's place and I finally figured that out.  ;)  I am so thankful for my past because I didn't have some miraculous thing happen that made me see Him, but rather a ship full of pain and emotional volcano that was demanding answers!  The first miracle I was ever able to proclaim after I was saved, was that I was standing there alive!  YAHOO AMEN!  ;)  May not seem like much but after my looking back I was able to see all the times where He sent people in to save me and keep me going.  I can't help but smile at all of the times since my earliest memories I can remember something happening, but not knowing who God was and so not being able early on to give Him the credit!  My life is the epitome of "if things were always good, I would have continued to pat myself on the back, but since things were going terribly wrong, I wanted to blame someone, and the blame was headed His way!"

It took me a while to see all of the miraculous things taking place around me..  I had to get rid of my "stinkin' thinkin" (Thanks Shad W, love that term!)!  I had to see the whole picture not just the room I was in.  Things weren't perfect overnight.  I don't live a fairytale life today either.  With my new (12 years) life in Him, I just get to see things a whole new way!  I am an eternal optimist now and am thankful for my outlook on life. 

He tells us we will encounter hardships and pain again, possibly again and again.  With every hardship and valley I have grown more and am closer to Him.  Pretty sure that is the design.  We are all handed different pages in this crazy life.  One person's perception of pain and suffering cannot be compared to another's.  One person's idea of a miraculous answer cannot be compared to another either.  It seems in every valley we are in there is always a miraculous outcome at the end.  People speak of waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel.. The feeling of "we can't be stuck in here forever, the end is in sight right?"  At the end of every troubling time, there is reward.  Maybe not right here right now, but at some point.  God will use it all for his good.  So cliche I know, but so intensely true for me! 

It's the little everyday miracles...  Taking a breath without thinking about it.  All of us waking up to get to experience another day together.  Being able to pay my bills.  The sun coming up each day.  Staying married for 10+ years..  Ok that falls under BIG MIRACLE.. ;)  Then you have the life changing miracles.  Growing a baby inside of you, or someone you love.  Staying married for 10+ years (when you almost divorced at 2 years, I say yes, MAJOR MIRACLE!!!).  Being able to forgive someone.  Being forgiven by someone.  Seeing someone "defy all the earthly odds" and watch God tell everyone "not yet, he's yours for a while (in His eyes, anywhere from another hour to 110 more years!) longer!  All that to say that when the answer is something else that His hand is still in it and then the miracle is of the grace He gives us to accept it and go on.  And for me, the full on miracle of the faith that I never knew I was capable of, to believe in said things and the possibilities of so many more. 

I got to see miracles because I knew God...  And still do...  I just wasn't able to see them before..  Everyday.  All around us.  Am so thankful that I get to witness these things and praise Him all of the time!

After learning that a sweet boy I have come to know and love, had been pronounced in remission yesterday, I could not help but stop in awe of God and take a little inventory or the miracles in my own life that I personally have witnessed!  You should know that 2 short months ago, "doom and gloom" rained out the mouths of the Dr's calling for hospice and end of life care for this lil guy.  Proof that you should never give up nor underestimate what God is capable of!  YOU DON'T KNOW!  :) 

Rejoicing today!
K

Video idea borrowed from another sweet blog.. One of my favorite songs and oh so fitting!  http://www.prayfornoah.com/